Tonight, I drink to loneliness

Another log in the loneliness catagory. Fun times are happening in Caleb's life. I haven't really posted in here at all in a long time. There's only been a lot of twitter posts with pictures which is good enough but that's still not very stable.

Tonight my drink of choice is vodka and cranapple juice. Yeah, cranapple because that's all I have here at the house. So wtf is wrong with me. I'm almost convinced there is something wrong with me and that everybody doesn't have the nerve to tell me. There's almost gotta be something wrong with me to be single for this long right? I'm approching four years single now. That's fucking sad. Four years of being alone in my room, four years of having nobody to do things with, four years of haivng nobody close, four years of having nobody to really let out to, four years of me and myself. I just don't get it. I thought I had a decent personality and looked passable for somebody to date at the minimum. It's just mind boggling. Am I to arrogent, to stuck up, to picky? I really have no clue.

Although desperate I'm not as desperate as my friend Ryan. I am thankful for that. He's with this chick that is destinted for disaster and then there's my friend Chris who is right up there with him going on three years with this chick that treats him like trash and takes his money. He totally deserves better and she's just a total cunt. He complains about her constantly. I know other guys might complain a little about thier chicks which is alright but it's kind of out of hand with those two.

I'm gunna stop now with the emo'ness and get back to my drinking. Drinks will just put me to sleep, which at this point would be a upgrade to how I'm feeling now. Although, I had a dream the other day about the 17/18 year old from a while ago. The dream involved us going out and hooking up one night. I haven't even talked to her since last October so it was pretty random. Needless to say my un-conscience mind is going to same place that I am going right now.